Roseanne feels she's sunk to an all-time low when she gets a job sweeping up hair at a hair salon.
Determined to squeeze back into an old pair of jeans, Roseanne commits herself (and Dan, much to his horror) to yet another dieting spree.
Roseanne and Dan contemplate a lawsuit after Mrs. Wellman rear-ends Roseanne in her car.
The inmates close ranks as Red and Piper’s cold war escalates. Piper makes a new ally.
Healy gives Piper an offer she can’t refuse, while Pornstache approaches Red with his own proposition. Pennsatucky rages about the election results. Taystee tries to start a new chapter.