Lucille's scheme to upstage her rival, Lucille Austero, at a bachelorette auction backfires when Gob mistakenly bids $10,000 on the wrong Lucille.
The family attorney announces that if $20,000 in bail money is raised, George Sr. can be released from prison in time for the Christmas "Living Classics Pageant."
Convinced that the family's image is hurting his son's future, Michael hires an attractive publicist who proceeds to write a scathing article after Michael rebuffs her advances.
After discovering that most of the family picks up weekly paychecks from Bluth Company even though they don't have jobs, Michael tries to put them all to work.
Despite his crush on Marta, Michael agrees to help Gob figure out if she has a new lover while George-Michael tries to figure out his feelings for his cousin Maeby.